Simon Hunter
@simoninmadrid
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Royal commentator in Spain, journalist, translator, voice over artist. @thetimes @lasextatv @antena3com @La1_tve @cuatro , among others. Brit, Irish, Madrileño
Madrid, Spain
Joined February 2009
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In Spain people who don’t know me tend to call me Simón, with the accent on the O. When I speak to a call centre, they tend to call me, politely, Don Simón. Which is, unfortunately, the brand name of cheap carton wine beloved by drunks all over the country
What's the biggest problem you have with your name?
My biggest problem?
Me: "Hi, I'm Marcus. Nice to meet you."
Business people: "Hi, Marcus. Do you go by Mark?"
Me: "No. If I did then don't you think I'd introduce myself as that?"
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You have no idea how hard I find it to tell the difference between her real account and this parody one
Siguiendo con preocupación la situación en Israel. He dado instrucciones para que la Hostelería madrileña permanezca abierta pase lo que pase.
Resistiremos.
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Pregnant Spanish influencer takes picture at Berlin Holocaust Memorial (already a bad idea). Posts on Instagram with hashtag
#babyintheoven
... There are no words...
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Alright Madrileños, send me your best life hacks for living in the Spanish capital. It's for an article. My favourite so far: Never change trains at Diego de León without walking boots on
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Living a bilingual life might sound exciting but most of the time it’s just forgetting words in two different languages
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Pues vaya día en Twitter que he pasado! Tranquilos españoles, sé hacer una tortilla española de verdad (vean abajo) y lo de ayer fue una inocentada para April Fool’s. Gracias por todas las respuestas, me he reído un montón!!
This, my friend, is a Spanish tortilla (plate of jamón optional)
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BREAKING: Public prosecutor in Spain is accusing Colombian singer Shakira of €14.5 million tax fraud, on allegations she feigned a primary residence in the Bahamas to avoid paying Spanish Tax Agency
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@DatTormeyFela
Hahaha that’s brilliant. My favourite student error when I taught English in Spain was when “breakfast” became “breastfuck”
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One of my all time favourite moments in Modern Family. Always hits a nerve
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Bueno, pues hoy es mi último día de trabajo en
@el_pais
/
@elpaisinenglish
. Afortunadamente he tenido la oportunidad de despedirme esta semana de muchos compañeros maravillosos en persona, pero para los que no he visto os mando un fuertísimo abrazo por aquí, y abro 🧵👇
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@sidlowe
i don't know mate, i would hazard a guess she doesn't even know what the holocaust is. this is, after all, David Bisbal's ex...
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I don’t care what FIFA says. I’m wearing my rainbow armband
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My word, for all those who have been concerned about the Spanish government’s handling of the coronavirus crisis, I invite you to observe the shitshow currently being conjured by Boris Johnson and Dominic Raab
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Just when you thing the tories can’t sink any lower, you wake up to this
Kay Burley: Should we really be sending refugees to a country that had a genocide of a million people in 1994?
Simon Hart: Rwanda has a good human rights record.
I'm out of words,
@Simonhartmp
.
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Hats off to this journalist, who basically had the stones to "You OK hun?" Boris Johnson
The one thing you want to be asked after a performance is “is everything ok”
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First time back in
@el_pais
for a looong time. First thing the security guard said to me: “You’re fatter, no?”
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I will always share this gem when it appears on my timeline
Turn up the volume to properly appreciate every detail of such an outstanding piece of art.
Taberna Casa Manteca, Cádiz.
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Just a quick apology to all our readers of
@elpaisinenglish
. As you probably know we're a small team and we can't always cover all the stories we need to. Unfortunately there just won't be time this week to do an in-depth report on Pablo Iglesias's new haircut. I'm truly sorry
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No Messi didn’t send a fax to say he’s leaving Barcelona. My friends from
@English_AS
explain: What is a burofax and what does it do?
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Celia Barquín, a 22-year-old Spanish golf player from Cantabria, has been found murdered on a course in the United States. She was considered one of Spain’s most promising young golf players, and was studying civil engineering at Iowa State University
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I would like to point out that this is NOT from our
@elpaisinenglish
page!!! But to be honest, I may add to our style guide that we should call Casado this from now on, and Iglesias should be referred to as "Churches"
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This, my friend, is a Spanish tortilla (plate of jamón optional)
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Three days later and
#tortillagate
still going strong. This is what I’m going to be known for the rest of my life, isn’t it
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Things like this make it possible to love and hate English all at the same time
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The first time I make the front page of The Times and it's because of
#croquetagate
... 🤦♂️
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So, today is my last day of work at
@el_pais
/
@elpaisinenglish
! I posted this message already in Spanish to thank my colleagues but in this English version I’d like to start by expressing my gratitude to our readers
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Hey Siri, what is a “slow news week”?
El periodista británico
@simoninmadrid
lleva 23 años en España y conoce muy bien a sus ciudadanos. El 1 de abril, el día en el que los anglosajones celebran sus inocentadas, se le ocurrió llamar a unas sobras de su nevera con huevo "tortilla española" y su broma se hizo viral
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Only in Spain could you be given a pin as an eating utensil
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Twenty-three years ago today I rocked up in Madrid with a suitcase. I’ve been a very lucky hombre since
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"Down with this sort of king" wins the protest placard competition
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Protesters have taken to the streets to demonstrate against the Supreme Court ruling in the case of the Catalan separatist leaders tried for their involvement in the 2017 breakaway attempt. The protests are expected to intensify as the day progresses
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Jeez looks like an absolute shitshow on the part of British airways and Iberia today for UK residents of Spain trying to get home
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Just read in the Guardian that, post-pandemic, "people who are only in the office on Tuesdays, Wednesday and Thursdays" has sparked the acronym "Twats". I approve
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David Simon understanding “olé tus huevos” as “smell your balls” is one of the greatest things I’ve seen on Twitter
Okay, so I’ve wasted the entire morning insulting the mothers and rhetorical paucity of Spanish fascists and Francoists on Twitter. But I have learned that “smell your balls” is actually a compliment. So it’s a bit of a break-even.
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This tweet aged well
¿Y cómo piensa el Gobierno de Sánchez frenar el “dumping internacional”?
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A friend just sent me another one of these automatic translations. “Fear of sprouts” is just brilliant
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I was wondering where everyone had gone
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#tortillagate
day 7
Heated debate on Twitter about the way a Brit makes Spanish tortilla
#tortillagate
But Simon lives in Madrid 😳…
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OK Spain fans, it's finally here! La Portada, a new podcast from me and m'colleague
@lilymayers
, focusing on Spanish news, culture, interviews and anything else we think you'll love to hear about. Our Twitter account is
@LaPortadaPod
, you'll find links there to subscribe (1/2)
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A clip with David Bisbal is inspiring all kinds of memes and I freely admit I don’t really get it. Anyone wanna explain?!
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I mean... I'd google this to check it was real before sharing but I think I already know that it is without even bothering
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This parody account is killing it this week
Pese a que no hubo ningún medio británico que hiciera caso a mi visita, mi discurso en inglés no podía quedar sin ser emitido.
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Alright people, I should be on
@laSextaTV
at about 7.30pm Spain time this evening to try to explain the day's events in British politics. Please wish me luck
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The Spanish government has set a date for the exhumation of former dictator Francisco Franco, and barring any action taken by the courts in the meantime, he will be reinterred in the state-owned El Pardo cemetery
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Can someone explain to me what the hell is going on in Madrid? It's for a friend. He has to write about it in an online newspaper.
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If only Spaniards had breakfast like the English... imagine how things would have turned out
#OnThisDay
1964: Tonight wasn't impressed by the Spanish's rather un-British attitude towards breakfast, but frankly they're probably just jealous.
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A high-speed train ticket from Madrid to Barcelona for just €10? This rock-bottom price for Spain’s AVE service is set to become a reality from next year, as state rail firm Renfe launches its low-cost AVLO trains
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As I have mentioned here before, I did the voice of the announcements on the avlo trains here in Spain. It’s great to get fan mail like this once in a while about my work
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Twenty years ago today I arrived in Spain with nothing more than a suitcase. Two whole decades later, I've found a city and a country I truly love, made (and lost) a whole load of amazing friends, been lucky enough to count on some really interesting jobs (and a few shit ones)...
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My kind of guy
No os quiero enamorar, pero he hecho paella tradicional valenciana.
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They obviously sent this menu translator on a cultural sensitivity course
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This is what people call me in formal situations and it drives me nuts
This rubbish wine lives rent free in the collective unconscious of the country.
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My neighbors have taken in a Ukrainian woman and her 10yr-old son, so this morning I lent them bikes and helmets and we all went for a ride up Madrid Río. They were such lovely people and we had a great morning, but I came away so angry that they're in this situation. Fuck Putin
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An 82-year-old man infected with the coronavirus died in the Basque Country on Wednesday, becoming Spain’s second official fatality. The number of infections in Spain had climbed to 229 by this morning after cases were detected in Asturias and Mallorca
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Our
#MostRead
story this week at
@elpaisinenglish
was, bizarrely, this unfortunate tale from 2017 of a bullfighter who got more in the ring than he was bargaining for
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As someone once said, the Spanish Legion really is the fruitiest regiment out there
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Son number two getting some reading practice in the ‘hood
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OK so after having struggled for years using the Cl
@ve
system for Spanish bureaucracy, I've managed to sort myself a Certificado Digital in a single morning and it works like a dream. 💯% recommend
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Pfizer dose 2, in my arm! Took me a few calls to get the appointment but it was bang on 21 days later. Unlike first dose, no queue at all and i was done in 15 mins. Good show
@ComunidadMadrid
!
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