Joe Swanson
@Joe69Swanson
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1,144
Following
984
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238
Statuses
2,017
Mossad wizards are trying to explode my head from the inside
Quahog, RI
Joined October 2009
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Pinned Tweet
You should never EVER sprinkle cocaine into a container of Zyns and spray a fine mist of water over them then close the container and shake it and let it infuse for 20-30 minutes. That would be wrong and illegal. It definitely wouldn’t give you sustained focused energy either.
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everyone keeps attacking women for being women
paglia said this long ago
if left to their own devices they'd barely be living in grass huts
yes they're ridiculous just go have sex with them ni77a what do you want a buddy to play chess with on a set schedule?
Women will do anything other than traditional cardio, weight training, count calories and stick to a program long enough to see results
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My buddy’s dad was a very accomplished orthopedic surgeon and super intelligent
Loved him like a second dad and we spent a lot of time together before he passed
One day we were hanging out and he brought up the theory that all women are technically genetically mildly retarded…1/
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July 5th is almost over! WHERES MY FALLOUT!?
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Shootin' at the clouds (yuh)
Smokin' on that loud (yuh)
Killin' aliens (yuh)
Make it rain again (yuh)
Fade the FDA (yuh)
Burn my books no way (yuh)
Send me to prison (yuh)
Death by heart-attack gun (yuh)
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The Smokeshow Latinx to Abuela train might occasionally be late but it always arrives eventually.
Lima is of Portuguese, Native Brazilian, African, Japanese, Swiss, and West Indian descent.
No happy endings with racemixing.
This downfall still haunts me every single day that I wake.
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Accidentally carved a wizard into my carrot while making my carrot salad, is this peaty?
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Most of you don’t even realize you’re complete losers
You live a below average life
MAYBE 100k/year
Gf is a soft 7 with makeup
Only have new experiences maybe twice a year
Basically the live of a peasant
But somehow you think you’re living a great life
If you only knew…
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Having a full extra chromosome is what causes downs syndrome. Men are XY whereas women are XX meaning the extra bit of the chromosome that makes them women also makes them partially retarded on a biological level. 2/
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Also why men and women will never truly understand one and other.
We exist on two close but very separate physical and metaphysical planes.
Suspended above one and other, but never quite touching.
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@NorwoodDefeat
I love you very much but holy hell I haven’t laughed so hard at a hairstyle or really anything in general in a long time. 😭
It’s the whole package really… KEK over 9000 thank you for brightening my day!
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Gm plz enjoy the rest of your week and the love of your spring
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Every female "comedian's" material inevitably boils down to this:
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This is clearly Wendy’s soft serve vanilla ice cream in some brush:
Have you seen a frost flower this year?
Let me tell you how to find them before the deep cold sets in.
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WITHOUT Googling, name a famous historical battle.
WITHOUT Googling, name a famous historic battle.
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Life is about P̸̟͖̯̩̻̖̰̱̅r̵̙̰̭̜̄͛̍̊̚ö̷̰̞͖̬́͌̔͛̈́̽ţ̵͉͔̟̖̙̗̣̳̔͝ę̸̯͎̰̮͍̘̑̅͛̈́̕ͅc̶̫̜̞̩̼̞̘̆̊͌̈́t̶̢͉͕̩̫̤͔̍̋̀̒̓̋ì̵̢̡̹͈̟̹͔̙̩̱̾̏́̚͠͝͝ň̷̨̲̠͔̣̮̎͊g̴̢̫̜̘͕̺̥̟̺̑͑͋̏̓̍̓̊͒ ̴̱͚͚̬̹̻̮͖̰̳̓y̵̛̪̻̗̆̒̎̎͋̋́̕͠ͅơ̶͇̈́͊̇ū̵̺̟̲̹r̷̭͆̚ͅ ̴̨͕̮̖̟̀́̚s̸̡̧̛͙͔̲̝̃͊̏̈͌͐͂̎͜ó̵̢͎̖̤͙̬͈̹͚̲͋̆̽̆͗ṷ̴̢̪͙̹̜̜̠̿͆̈́͑ͅl̵̡͖͎̳̓̈͐͗͠
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Maybe an unpopular opinion around these parts but any time I see “it’s demonic” or “demons” or other completely dismissive and broad rejection to anything even remotely referencing non Christian spiritual traditions I know I’m dealing with someone who is either lazy or scared 1/
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You’re a detective in 1980’s Miami. What is your go to:
- handgun
- rifle
- car
- soundtrack
You’re a detective in 1980’s Miami. What is your go to:
- handgun
- rifle
- car
- soundtrack
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Why weren’t you able to even get over a thousand followers with your magic powers god code and infinite abundance hack?
Sad!
Are you curious about the secrets of life and want to get more out of your life?
Follow me to escape the matrix and live life on your own terms.
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I don’t actually eat sea food,
I just order it to feed to women:
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Being friends with
@LatinxPutler
is like we all decided to go to the college bar to find an after party to crash and when a girl finally invites us back to the sorority house, he has to go home because: “he has to be at work early tomorrow and can’t mess with his sleep schedule.”
Being friends with
@LatinxPutler
is like everyone is in prison, and we all devise a plan to escape in the morning. Everyone is on board with it but when the word makes it to Will, he says, “nah sorry man I’ve got library duty during that time”,
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“banned from the company gym after smelling the bench after my work crushes set”
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Is this peaty?
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So absolutely low effort but I haven’t seen anything like this on the TL yet
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lol they fucked up the parachutes and pancaked some Palestinian kids. SGT Trayvon fucked up!
🚨 3 people were killed and 11 injured after aid was dropped without deployed parachutes near Al Shati Camp, Gaza.
Children are among the martyrs.
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You need to be scaring the hoes anon. You need to be agressionmaxxing. You need to be raypistcoded, it’s how we win.
Understand women will literally find anyone or anything attractive as long as he's sexually frightening/aggressive.
Female sexuality evolved out of millennia of sexual slavery... There are studies, women have physiological responses to videos of chimps mating... ANY sexual
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Women were nice to me yesterday and broke my heart today so I hate them. Might refuse to learn from my mistakes.
Women have been nice to me today so I don't hate them. Might change my opinion tomorrow
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Easy switches to make:
-glass spatula
-glass water bottle
-glass Tupperware
-glass toothbrushes
-glass underwear
@AlpacaAurelius
Easy switches to make:
-metal spatula
-stainless steel water bottle
-glass Tupperware
-wooden toothbrush
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>Would absolutely wear this to a vegan restaurant and sloppily chug a gallon of milk until I vomited it all over their floor.
>Refuse to elaborate.
>Leave.
>Continue to do this randomly once a month until they caught on.
>Start wearing disguises to evade suspicion.
>Profit?!
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Israel = cozy indie book store with a coffee shop offering discounts to marginalized identities
Hamas = Tyrone Jiggabo looting everything
@LotusInTheSwamp
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I’ve seen a lot of coal but this is an absolutely VANTABLACK take, wow!
bisexual in males is just an overactive sex drive. All men would be bi if you pumped enough testosterone in them.
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Nivea is very prepared
Desensitized, sensitive young men who are approaching their 30’s.
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@ploughmansfolly
Absolutely me, glad I’m the first one to post this guy. Also imagine how comfortable those robes were! I’m tryna bring back ancient drip like this!
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I’d be at this boxing gym every single day. 366 on leap years.
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f̷̺͉̫̎́̃̄̆r̵̙͑̍̐͑̓͆̊͐̄ͅơ̷̡̥̝̟͖͇͈̳̙͇̈̈́m̶̥̭̪̰͍̣̥̾́͐̆ͅͅ ̵͎̼͇͖̭̩̎̆̄d̶̡̟̜̽̓͑́æ̷̡̢̨̙̬̳̃̏͐̋͜͠͝m̵̢̱̲͕͂̉͑͑̄̕͝o̸͍̣̯͍̮̤̙̳̼̊̌n̵̛̩̖̹̙̝̱͙͚͂̂͑͂̆̾̽̕͝ͅs̷̨̪̠͊̕͝
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Post a random photo otherwise everything will go wrong in December
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“Just took my Balenciaga episode out from behind the paywall: in this episode I connect the dots on a Friendly’s children’s menu with crayons.”
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Love song on the TL (the end got split into second tweet in thread)
Love to all my moots ❤️🤍🖤
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Timeline Cleanse – if you see this post a cat:
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POV you’re my phone after I spend an hour trying to keep up with all of the insane GC’s I’ve been added to on X (formerly known as Twitter)
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It is a tacit admission that one believes in the entirety of our history, not a single angelic being or messenger of God ever transmitted any sacred knowledge to anybody ever prior to Abraham & Jesus and the only spiritual entities interacting with humans at all were “demons” 2/
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Men (M), would you rathe be:
Women (W) would you rather be with a man who is:
Skinnyfat (M)
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Fat-Jacked (M)
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Skinnyfat (W)
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Fat-Jacked (W)
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Elons X giving Israeli propaganda accounts the golden star checkmark
(Also an actual ad by the way)
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Once the fear of demons is assuaged one can begin to separate and recognize the familiar characters and actors behind these spiritual traditions. They’re given many names but when your eyes are open you’ll always recognize our friends, the Angels who have long been at work here.
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Without downloading any new pics, what’s your energy going into 2024?
Without downloading any new pics, what’s your energy going into 2024?
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Anyone who actually understands our history and the origins of the vast majority of these spiritual traditions knows who started them and why the current bearers have seemed to have fallen from grace. They are not the progeny. 3/
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